Mono, you have overstayed your welcome...

I will go ahead and apologize for the content of this entry because I am entirely convinced someone kicked my face/head/stomach and back last night while I slept... that, or ran me over with their truck because I feel like crap. I also have been so dizzy that driving, walking, or even functioning today have been out of the question and while I strongly considered getting a doctor's appointment, I think insurance quits covering you after ya know.. the 10th or 11th yearly visit. Another thing, actually the main thing, preventing me from calling for antibiotics is my level of embarrassment at how frequently my doctor sees me and the fact that she knows more about me than 99% of my immediate family members. Sometimes I feel like she must wonder if I go downtown on the weekends and wear a sign that simply says "If you're sick, please come infect me." In the past 6 months I feel like I've gone to the poor woman with strep throat, kidney infections, the flu, every virus bug from here to Texas and drum roll please... the always lovely, mono. Every time I've visited her I've gotten the same ole' "don't share cups with friends, drink plenty of water, take vitamins, etc" but there is always the jokingly said, yet completely serious question that comes at the end; "Have you kissed or been in close contact with lots of members of the opposite sex lately?" As sad as it is, the reality is that my doctor assumes that my life is a lot more interesting than it truly is. While I can proudly say I am not on UGA's overflowing list of baby sorostitutes and that my love life is in fact so dull that I'm probably catching all these nasty illnesses from the girls that sit next to me in class STILL in their shacker clothers, my doctor probably begs to differ. Well Dr.Martin, my life is still boring, free of anything allowing me to catch saliva-transmitted illnesses and I've been taking so many vitamins hoping to avoid you that I feel like a walking GMC store. Why I'm always sick, I don't know. My only conclusion is that my immune system is in cahoots with the weatherman that pays a raincloud to follow me around all of the time. Yep, personal raincloud and trashbag full of empty pill bottles, my.life.rocks.